Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Love You Inside Out

I ain't no vision, I am the man, who, sings way up high....

song: Love You Inside Out • artist: Bee Gees

Sunday, April 27, 2014

Parenting is...

a plastic Playmobil pirate flag spiked into your bar of soap.

Sunday, April 20, 2014

The Love Some(bunny)

If it's even possible, I think I like the Easter bunny even less than leprechauns.
I mean how am I supposed to sell this? He's not even human!
Now that H has the whole crucifixion thing down he's thinking that the Easter bunny is actually Jesus.
Yes honey, Jesus came back from the dead in order to hide plastic eggs in our backyard.

song: To Love Somebody • the BeeGees

Monday, April 14, 2014

Losing My Religion

As adults I think we forget how big a deal it is to loose a tooth.
As adults losing stuff, especially stuff off our bodies, is bad. We lose our hair, our waist lines, our eyesight, our hearing - please stop me when you've heard enough.
But for a kid - losing a tooth is huge.
I would say in fact that loosing that first tooth might be the elementary school equivalent of loosing your virginity except that it's more socially acceptable to talk openly about it.
Here's how the conversation might go whether you're ease dropping on seven or seventeen year olds:
"Did you loose yours yet?"
"Yeah. I lost mine."
"I lost mine too."
"Hey guess what? Marcus lost two in one day."
"Two of them? Wow. They must have been really loose."


song: Losing My Religion • artist: R.E.M.

Monday, April 07, 2014

Let 'Em In

As if motivated by the fact that my toddlers are no longer toddlers my cat is now acting like a toddler.
I go into the bathroom and she claws at the door until I let her in.
She enters. Sees that I'm peeing and gives me an, "is that all you're doing look." Then she scratches the door to be let out so I let her out.
She decides maybe I'm no longer peeing but doing something more interesting and starts scratching again.
She is disappointed. I let her out.
Luckily it's a very small bathroom.

song: Let 'Em In • artist: Paul McCartney

Friday, April 04, 2014

The Tao of my Twins

Always stop and smell the roses.
Unless you have to pee.
Then just get in the house.