Tuesday, January 27, 2015

Talking in Your Sleep

The Tao of my Twins: Lesson #21

Being a twin means speaking up faster than your mom at your seven-year well child visit when the doctor asks if your brother snores.
Me: I think so.
N: Yes. He snores.

Power to the People

The difference between sitting out a snowstorm with the electricity on and being in one when the power's out is like Mary Poppins vs Lord of the Flies.
Glad to be Mary Poppins this time around.

song: Power to the People • artist: John Lennon

Friday, January 23, 2015

Troubled Man

Well maybe you should get some therapy instead of just singing about it.

song: Troubled Man • artist: John Mellencamp

Wednesday, January 21, 2015

Walk On By

Old Beer.
How disappointing.

song: Walk On By • artist: Dionne Warwick

Tuesday, January 20, 2015

You Can Do Magic II

Here's what I love about the internet.
You can google "can I freeze my homemade crackers?" and you'll get like a dozen links to blog posts about how easy it is to freeze your homemade crackers usually complete with recipes, photos and maybe even a video tutorial.
Admittedly it might be overkill but it beats asking your Magic 8 Ball.

song: You Can Do Magic • artist: America

Sunday, January 18, 2015

You Can Do Magic

We went to check out the new playground at Morse Pond School during last week's half day. I think everyone had fun despite it being about -3°C out.
I asked H about it at dinner.
MOM: How'd you like the new playground?
H: Great. I'll be at that school next year.
MOM: Yup.
H: For two years. Unless.
MOM: Unless what?
H: Unless I get a letter from Hogwarts when I turn 11.

song: You Can Do Magic • artist: America

Saturday, January 17, 2015


Parents and grandparents who sit in the bleachers directly behind the basketball hoop at the rec center's basketball for six and seven year olds either have a lot of faith or an excellent insurance policy.
Lots of nose picking and eating it taking place on both teams during today's game. Guess no one got enough breakfast.

song: Faith • artist: George Michael

Monday, January 12, 2015

You Can't Judge a Book by the Cover

"I look like a farmer, but I'm a lover.
You can't judge a book by looking at the cover."

I don't get it - farmers can't be lovers?
And as a graphic designer I frequently judge a book by its cover. If you can't invest in a decent designer for your book cover - well that does say something about you and about your book now doesn't it?

song: You Can't Judge a Book by the Cover • artist: Bo Diddley

Sunday, January 11, 2015

Parenting is ...

Giving the two stuffed bears a very gentle good night hug, kiss, and nose nuzzle, because, "they are hibernating."

Wednesday, January 07, 2015


Today I read a recipe on line that called for "one free-range egg."
How exactly does an egg free range?
Does the farmer have to carry the egg outside and manually roll it around in the grass?
I can just hear the egg shouting (it's got the voice of Gilbert Gottfried), "Wheeeeee! Look Ma! I'm free ranging!"

song: Freebird • artist: Lynyrd Skynyrd

Tuesday, January 06, 2015

afternoon snack (a quatrain)

busses rumble
stomaches grumble
hungry kids
open fridge

Tainted Love

For the record I did purchase the tomato that dropped onto the supermarket floor when I was molesting the produce today.
Serves me right for buying tomatoes in January.

song: Tainted Love • artist: Soft Cell

Thursday, January 01, 2015

Parenting is...

hanging up the banner even though it says, "Happy New Yaer"