Friday, October 31, 2014

After Midnight

Halloween sugar crash.
Some holidays just make you wish you were a Jehovah's Witness.

song: After Midnight • artist: Eric Clapton

ps. I saw this tour!

One Bad Apple

Trolled the thrift shops for months looking for a double boiler before finding the perfect one. I know you can melt chocolate in the microwave but it comes out smoother with a double boiler. So I was in domestic goddess mode this morning and I went to get it out for shortbread dipping - and then I remembered that N is wearing the bottom half of it on his head.
Curse you Johnny Appleseed!

song: One Bad Apple • artist: The Osmonds

You Go Down Smooth

I was all set to give out the fair trade dark chocolate minis that I bought at the church from the Fair Trade Committee. Did I mention that I love the Unitarian Universalist church - because they have things - like a Fair Trade Committee. But then Ken bought two bags of Kit Kat bars so I ate the chocolate minis myself.
What else could I do right?

song: You Go Down Smooth • artist: Lake Street Drive

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Ruby Tuesday

Sometimes I think that all I do all day is drive my kids around - and eat chocolate.
Which, I suppose, isn't all that bad.

song: Ruby Tuesday • Rolling Stones

Monday, October 27, 2014

Before You Accuse Me

I've been deleting e-mails from "Native Exotics," assuming that it was some Native American mail order bride company - or worse - but then I realized it's the company I ordered two of my four carnivorous plants from.

song: Before You Accuse Me • artist: Eric Clapton

Saturday, October 25, 2014

Candy (Everybody Wants)

At the Trick or Treat on Main Street event this afternoon the twins kept choosing the worst candy!
Not the Twizzlers! Get some Kit Kats!
No! Put down those Whoopers and grab a Snickers Bar!
Dum Dums? Are you kidding!?
Plus N wouldn't wear his saucepan on his head so no one knew he was supposed to be Johnny Appleseed. Instead he was using it to put the candy in so some people thought he was a panhandler. Which is a funny play on words, but not what I intended.

song: Candy Everybody Wants • artist: 10,000 Maniacs

Thursday, October 23, 2014

Brown Sugar

Davy Crockett, Johnny Appleseed, a cowboy, and a jester - those are this year's costume choices at our house.
When I was a kid you had to dress as something thematically associated with Halloween, or with autumn at the very least. I was a scarecrow, black cat, witch, ghost. One year my sister was an apple core, another, an ear of corn (she had a fruit and vegetable theme going or something.)
Every year I secretly yearned to be a gypsy or a hippie like every other girl in my class but I never went as far as to buck tradition.
H is being Davy Crockett. We bought a real (yes real) raccoon tail at the Fryeburg Fair and I sewed it onto an appropriately-shaped faux fur hat. The cat freaked out while I was sewing the tail, she kept trying to grab it and run off with it or at least locate the rest of the raccoon.
Anyway, the hat's done and he's got the rifle replica, really once you've got a coonskin hat, who else could you be but Davy Crockett? Costume done right? 
Not so fast. 
I wanted him to have a brown fringe shirt. He's to short for the jacket I bought in college, which would have been perfect (I guess I should dress as Davy Crockett for Halloween) so I figured I could just get a brown shirt, make my own fringe, and sew it on.
After checking thrift shops, Walmart, TJMaxx, and of course my own attic, I can safely say that brown is the least popular color for a shirt on the planet. Walmart has t-shirts and long sleeve t-shirts in every color; there's even a section of neon colors, every color but brown that is.
I looked on-line thinking I could get a brown fleece from LLBean. No brown. I googled "kids brown shirt," I got t-shirts for the Cleveland Browns. I googled "kids chocolate shirts," in case they weren't calling brown, brown any more, i.e. eggplant for purple and slate for gray, I got t-shirts with picture of Hershey kisses on them.
Authentic raccoon tail? No problem. Brown shirt? Not on your life. 

song: Brown Sugar • artist: The Rolling Stones

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

I'm a Boy

Why is there a box for gender on the Cub Scout Registration Form?

song: I'm a Boy • artist: The Who

Sunday, October 19, 2014

Fool in the Rain

When your son wants to walk the long way back to the car even through it's drizzling, because there's a chance you might see wild turkeys - and you cave in a do it and then it starts pouring and the wild turkeys are long gone (because even a turkey is smarter than you about knowing when to get out of the rain), are you the cool mom who said yes - or just a chump? 

song: Fool in the Rain • artist: Led Zepplin

Saturday, October 18, 2014

Down in the Flood

When my kids think of children who are less fortunate then themselves, they'll likely think of kids who come to Storyland in the summer and who have to (gasp!) wait in line in order to ride the bamboo shoots.

song: Down in the Flood • artist: Bob Dylan

Black Socks II

My black, cast-iron fry pan never gets dirty either.

song: Black Socks • artist: Bill Harley

Saturday, October 11, 2014

Black Socks

Note to Bill Harley: Black dresses never get dirty either.

song: Black Socks • artist: Bill Harley

Thursday, October 09, 2014

parenting is ...

having squashed pennies and tiny plastic swords in your wallet.

Tuesday, October 07, 2014


Atlantis. The first landmass to fall victim to global climate change.
I felt a little high in the car just listening to this song.

song: Atlantis • artist: Donovan

Monday, October 06, 2014

Little Lies

S and N are identical twins but S says he likes chocolate and N says he doesn't.
So I'm pretty sure one of them is lying.

song: Little Lies • artist: Fleetwood Mac

Friday, October 03, 2014

Barnyard Boogie

Where are the t-shirts that read, "A Goat Ate My Bookmark at the Fryeburg Fair?" Because I'm sure S isn't the only one that's happened to.
Or maybe, "My family went to the Fryeburg Fair and all I got was this lousy bookmark. And a goat ate it."
"Keep Calm and Hold on to Your Bookmark."

song: Barnyard Boogie • artist Ann Rabson