Note to new parents, one day your child will enter the Guinness Book of World Records stage. Yes, this is a real stage, mark the section in the library, it will save you money when your child comes home with the Scholastic flyer and wants to order the 2016 edition (how the hell can it be out when it's still 2015?)
Likely the Guinness Book of World Records stage will be entered by your child just after the jokes and riddles stage, which, frustratingly, he or she will enter just before they actually learn how to read.
song: The Tattooed Lady and the Alligator Man • artist: Marcia Ball
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