It looks like you (got some explaining to do)

I just don't understand the rules of Easter. What exactly does the Easter bunny do? Does he (or she) take eggs you've already decorated and hide them in the yard? Does he (or she) hide eggs decorated by somebody else in the yard? Does he (or she) bring you an Easter basket, and if so, how does he (or she) get into your house - down the chimney like Santa? Do you provide the basket and the Easter bunny just fills it or does he (or she) bring a brand new basket every year?
I don't like this holiday because there's no agreed upon script. Whatever we decide, which is that the Easter bunny hides plastic eggs in the back yard and leaves presents on the deck, is most assuredly not what the Easter bunny does at other people's houses. How should I explain the inconsistencies? Do I say that the Easter bunny likes to "mix it up?"
It occurs to me that if my son had only come downstairs an hour ago when I had tissue paper, ribbons, plastic eggs, presents, and baskets strewn all over the dining room table the whole thing could have been over right then and there.
I can see why my parents stuck to the one about the religious figure who gets killed on "good" Friday and then brought back to life three days later. It's a lot easier to explain.

song: It looks like you (got some explaining to do)
artist: Evan Dando & The Lemonheads