The Shape I'm In

Every time we go to a birthday party my son declares after the party's over that he wants the same, theme/venue/entertainment at his party.
We go to the children's museum for a party - he tells me he wants to have his party at the children's museum. We go to one with a moon bounce in the back yard, he tells me he wants a moon bounce in the backyard at his birthday party
We went to a party recently that featured a party bus and Captain Scallywag, the party pirate. Of course, after the party was over (and we followed the bus out of the driveway), C said wistfully that he wished he could have a pirate at his birthday party.
I think if I could face paint and whip up a few balloon animals we might be able to skip the party pirate (who can trust a pirate these days anyway?) I have an art background, I should be able to handle it, though I'll admit Captain Scallywag painted a mean American flag on C's face and turned H into a good-lookin' shark.
As for the balloon animals, what it really comes down to is knowing how to make the sword. In the end, all the kids wanted to do was joust with balloon swords.
And the balloon sword doesn't look that difficult really. It's only one balloon with a few twists at the end. However, without the pirate send up and the backyard full of three-and-six year olds, the pirate sword could be misconstrued for something else entirely - something the party pirate might make for his adult parties - if you know what I mean. When, instead of Captain Scallywag, he goes by his other name - Long Dong Silver.

song: The Shape I'm In • artist: The Band